Letting go of Pernilla and embracing Penny

This week I’ve heard the most amazing things about myself.
When growing up I’ve always been that kind of girl that thinks I’m being classified and liked only by my looks (which I sometime still do), and that’s what I wanted compliments for – my looks. And when someone didn’t comment on it I felt like I wasn’t enough. Like I was letting my looks define who I was as a person.

This week people said to me;
You give the most amazing hugs.
You have such a beautiful soul.
You have this radiant energy.

Common Pernilla, what’s wrong with you? Sometimes when I look back I just want to slap myself in the face.
I have people around me that see me for more than just my looks, which helps me accepting myself just the way I am. This just makes me realize how incredible lucky I am to have people like this around me, every single day.

And the reason why I just called myself Pernilla is that my very clever and unbelievable mum said to me this week;
Why don’t you just let go of Pernilla and embrace Penny instead? 

The thing about traveling

Right now I’m at South Korea’s airport on my way back to Australia!
I’ve really loved being with my loved ones in Sweden, but I can’t wait to be back home with my other loved ones! Cause yes, Australia is now my home. I’ve been in Sweden far too long and I’m now ready to go back to reality (and the sun). All though I’m really happy I got to see the snow!

The hardest thing about living so far away from where you come from is to leave your family. I saw my sister for the first time in two years, cause we had a falling out, and now I’m going to miss her like crazy! She’s grown up to such an amazing woman and I’m so proud of her.
And of course my mum. ”I won’t cry!!!” Yeah, like that’s gonna happen. I stopped breathing for a minute or two as I was sobbing like an idiot. That’s the hardest part about living on the other side of the planet, all these ”goodbyes” and ”see you later”. They are tearing me apart, but only for a short moment. Then I realize why I’m living in Australia, cause I love it! This is my life now, and it feels so right!

The thing is I actually love traveling alone. Everyone’s like ”It takes soooo long to travel to Australia”. Yes, it does. But when I travel alone I can always find someone to talk to, and if I don’t want to talk I don’t have to. I can sleep, watch movies, read.
But here’s another thing I can add to the list of things I’ve done while traveling;
That one time I forgot my computer bag in the lounge at Amsterdam’s airport. Yes I did.
I’m a giddy woman.
But, I realized this while boarding the plane so I had to run back and one friendly soul had put it on one of the chairs and the flight attendant shouts; ”YOU ARE ONE LUCKY WOMAN!!” Yes I am. Thank you.

 

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I am grateful for 2015.

A new year is upon us and everyone who knows me knows that I have a little weird image of how new years eve is spend. I’ve always thought that the way I spend new years eve is how I’m gonna spend the upcoming year.

Well, then I’m gonna spend it with a lot of love and amazing people.

To be honest, I can be really ungrateful sometimes and I forget to thank all of you for all the amazing things you do for me.

The year of 2015 has been the year that I’ve experienced the most.
I moved to a new country on the opposite side of the planet.
I met a lot, a lot, of new friends.
My friendship to my old ones grew stronger.
I started studying something I find really fun and interesting.
I’ve had good days and I’ve had bad days.
I’ve learned that cook and cock are two completely different things.
I’ve learned that the moon is lying down in Australia instead of standing up. And this I learned six months later after I moved there when I thought there was a lunar eclipse that only I could see.
I’ve learned that Sidney is not the capital of Australia (sorry).

And I’ve learned that I can really count on people close to me.
But the most important thing – I’ve learned that I can always count on myself.

I’m not making any new years resolution. I’m setting goals:
– Not to put things on hold
– Do more stretching
– Not stress over money
– Breathe deeper
– Be more present

2016, I am now ready to be challenged.
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And she said ”It’s the thought that counts.”

My sister called me last night and reminded me of a Christmas present I got from her a long time ago.

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One year when we were kids me and my sister decided to give each other presents for ten days up until Christmas, with things we had in our home already.
So this one day I gave her this really beautiful porcelain cat that I’ve gotten from my grandma a couple years earlier. And I really loved this cat.
You know what she gave me? A cucumber piece. NOTE: a cucumber piece, not even a whole cucumber. I snatched the cat out of her hands and ran into my room angry AF.

And yesterday we laughed about this and she told me that at her work the chefs in the kitchen have banned her to eat cucumber because she eats it all. ”So if you think about it, you should feel honored that I shared a cucumber with you.”

Well, it’s the thought that counts, isn’t it? 
Merry Christmas everyone! Spread the love. 

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